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Friday, October 10, 2008

Former Ministry of Magic Worker Found Dead

By our Ministry Correspondent

Officials have today confirmed that the body of former Ministry of Magic employee, Hermes Wrigglesworth, was found in his home after reports of a break in.

Wrigglesworth's suburban mansion in Purley was emitting a high pitched scream for some 30 minutes before an auror arrived on the scene. The magical alarm was activated by persons unknown aparating into the premises, and there were signs of a struggle having ensued.

The body of Wrigglesworth was found in a back room, where he had been restrained by a powerful spell, and there was evidence of severe coercion before he died.

Wrigglesworth was a distinguished wizard. The Minister of Magic personally commending his work in reforming the regime at Azkaban. He was also creator of the autoindexing quill, the ever popular floo network interchange hub, and a range of mahogany wands created from managed rainforests.

He is survived by his estranged sons, two cats, a rabbit and an indeterminate number of mice.

The family have asked for donations to the Wizarding Pet Benevolent Fund in lieu of flowers.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

New Senior Undersecretary at the Ministry of Magic

By our Ministry Correspondent

The Minister of Magic today announced his new senior undersecretary as Quixotic Tuqiri.

Tuqiri is the high flyer from the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts department who has caused a stir with her no nonsense approach and attention to the small details.

The appointment was announced last night at a formal banquet in London. 

Saturday, October 4, 2008

Earthquake in New Salem

By Roberta Jordan

Midnight last night New Salem was awoken by a medium magnitude earthquake, which caused disturbance, and minor structural damage. Said Sibyl Seelyham: "I woke up to a heck of a racket - my windows were rattling, and I thought maybe someone's wand had backfired until I saw it was happening all over. The oddest thing was the strange whispering sounds though - and weird lights too".

No one was hurt in the earthquake, although Boris Foss Beacerbrook was treated for injuries after he tripped over his cat whilst checking for damage. However there were several other reports of whispers on the wind, and strange lights being seen.

Asked whether this event was natural or magical, the Ministry of Magic declined to comment.





Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Tornado’s rampage across Glasgow; 4 muggles killed, hundreds injured

By Ludavis Mortimer - Crime correspondent. 

Last night an unknown wizard of witch placed a magical item in the heart of Glasgow city centre - one designed to summon and emit a series of magically created tornados. The item was fully working for some twenty minutes before the Ministry of Magic law enforcement department were able to respond, and extensive damage was caused over a four acre region of the city. There was widespread destruction of shops and flats.

At least 4 muggles are known to have died from their injuries and the Unspeakables have confirmed that they have seized the enchanted item, and they are currently investigating. A spokemsan said "someone put a sizeable hole in the middle of Glasgow, but we are looking into it".

And Glaswegian wizards with information or evidence is asked to come forward to appropriate authorities, where they will be treated in strictest confidence. A ministry spokesman said "come forward before we pass the investigation over to the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, as they do not know how to say 'please'."


Friday, September 26, 2008

Correction

The Daily Prophet wishes to express its regret at the mis-spelling of the name of Clemontyne Rowbuck-Smith. We would like to set the record straight to Miss Roebick-Smith's family and are happy to do so. We erroneously used the spelling "Smythe" and have been told in no uncertain terms that she was definitely a "Smith". Clementine Smith passed away at the weekend.

The Daily Prophet apologises for offence caused and we trust the spelling of Miss Roebuck-Smitt's name is now quite clear.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Unexpected Bequest to Hogwarts School

By Alfred Burgin

Hogwarts school were celebrating an unexpected bequest this week from Clementine Roebuck-Smith, who died last Saturday after a short illness.

A significant proportion of her renowned collection of ancient and rare books were bequeathed to Hogwarts School Library in her will. These include at least one book written in the hand of one of the founders, Rowena Ravenclaw. Although considered a fairly unimportant notebook of daily accounts, it is nevertheless a book of near ienstiamble value, and many more works are still awaiting identification and classification.

"We are so grateful to Miss Roebuck-Smith for her consideration in her will." Said headmistress Copplepott, for Hogwarts School, "Some of the books are returning to their natural home. And who knows what treasures they hold".

Enquiries by parties interested in perusing these books should be sent to Madam Lotus, librarian of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.




Sunday, September 21, 2008

Obituary


We are sad to announce the passing of Clementine Roebuck-Smith, after a short period of illness. Roebuck-Smith was for many years a member of the Wizengamot, and had a succesful career in the research of the low level effects of domestic charm use on garden gnomes.

She will also be remembered for her extensive collection of rare and collectable books, which in some areas has been compared to the library of Hogwarts.

The family have asked that donations be sent to the garden gnome support agency benevolent fund in lieu of flowers.